Why I Don’t Want Chickens


Just lying there being pretty
Creative Commons License photo credit: storebukkebruse

Imagine this conversation:

Me: “So… a lot of people are kind of taking your side on our chicken debate. I’m surprised, actually.”

Mr. Money: “You’ve got some smart readers!”

Me: “Hey now, some of them agree with me too. A lot of them were curious why you are so adamant about not wanting chickens and why you’ll divorce me if I get them. You should write a post explaining why you don’t want chickens. It would be fun.”

Mr. Money: *crickets chirping*

And that’s how we get the privilege of Mr. Money’s post today. 🙂

I guess a lot of people are curious as to why I have no want for chickens and why chickens equal divorce. First of all, chickens don’t really equal divorce. I say that to her because if I don’t I will have baby chicks chirping away in the basement when I get home as a surprise. My wife likes to do things like that.

Take Jake. Jake was a pet rabbit we had a while back. We had rabbits in Colorado and could not bring them with us when we moved. So one day my wife calls me at work to tell me someone’s pet rabbit “wandered” into our yard. Later the truth came out that she had bought the rabbit after I told her to put up signs and canvas the neighborhood because someone would probably want their rabbit back. When Mrs. Money wants something, she will go to no end to make it happen. That is why I told her chickens equal divorce… just stop it right in its tracks!

I am not a chicken hater, I just like to weigh the good and the bad in things and then make decisions based on pros and cons. The cons just out weigh the pros when it comes to Mr. and Mrs. Money’s emporium of eggs. First off, we don’t even know if it is legal to have chickens. [Side note: Mr. Money has emailed our city to see if they are legal.  I’ve always assumed they are because there is someone in town who has them, along with goats.]  We don’t know the laws and I don’t want to buy supplies and build coops, then fill them with chickens only to have the city tell us to tear the coops down. That makes no financial sense.

Second, I love my neighbors. They are great, and while they are not right on top of us, they are a stone’s throw away. What they think about us having chickens matters to me because we have to live with them for however many years we stay in this house and they would have to live with the chickens for however long that would be.

We do have some other neighbors behind us that may not be so nice to the chickens: coyotes. The summer nights are filled with coyotes howling, barking, and jabbering. The sound of heckling coyotes and clucking chickens at 3:00 in the morning is something that I don’t think I really want.

Another reason I don’t want chickens is because of our dogs. The cute, cuddly black lab; and the sporty, spunky, always energetic daddy’s girl, the chocolate lab. They are two of the most beautiful bird dogs. If you could ask them if we should get chickens I bet they would side with Mrs. Money.

The last reason I don’t want chickens is the cost of having chickens verses the benefit of having fresh eggs just does not make sense to me. I just don’t see it. Yes, I am a chef and there is nothing better than fresh eggs. Fresh eggs from the coop are the best eggs any one will ever eat, but the cost of chickens, feed, supplies, building materials, etc. outweighs the cost in my mind. Right down the road is a person that sells fresh eggs. Organic eggs are not cheap at the store, but it is cheaper than having chickens. If I really want that fresh from the farm egg, I can buy them from the people down the road. [They are actually a few miles away.]

Those are all my reservations on having chickens. Mrs. Money has been at me on this chicken thing for a while now. She says it would be a fun hobby for her and that she would take responsibility for taking care of the chickens. I am not 100 percent against having chickens so I guess that means chickens don’t mean divorce. With more dialogue, maybe, just maybe, Mr. and Mrs. Money will have chickens… but not any time soon!

And that is why Mr. Money doesn’t want chickens.

What do you think: should we get chickens? Vote now!

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25 thoughts on “Why I Don’t Want Chickens

  1. Mrs. Accountability says:

    This was so cute! Thank you Mr. Money for sharing with us your reasons for not wanting chickens! I just wanted to mention we have dogs (four – unfortunately our first dog taught them all to be dedicated chicken killers) and we have coyotes (which sometimes yip and howl outside the perimeter of our 6′ chain link fence). We also have predatory owls that hunt at night. For this reason we built a nice secure coop for our hens which is completely enclosed at the top and on the sides and surrounded at the bottom by pallets. Unfortunately this somewhat deters the fun of having chickens. I would love to see the girls free ranging the property, scratching and eating bugs. Of course that would mean they would also be pooping on the porch and would have to be rounded up in their pen every single night. And they might lay their eggs wherever they pleased so I probably wouldn’t find them. I just really enjoyed this post, thank you both for a happy smile on my face this morning.


    Mrs Money Reply:

    Mrs. A- I am so glad you enjoyed the post! You have given me great tips and I hope that we can come to a good solution for both myself and Mr. Money. 😉


  2. Kacie says:

    Lol! Glad to have his perspective.

    Now I’m really with team Mr. Money. I just don’t see how it would save money and not be a huge hassle. And I forgot you had dogs!

    Maybe someday way in the future you can have some 🙂


    Mrs Money Reply:

    Kacie- Yeah, I see his points too. I always say they are HIS dogs. LOL


  3. Evan says:

    Once again, I am siding with Mr. Money. He has provided excellent arguments and well thought out points, vs. Mrs. Money (who I still favor as a blogger lol) who basically thinks it would be fun to have some chickens to take care of lol..oh yeah you also get to eat some fresh albeit way too expensive eggs.

    Stay Strong!


    Mrs Money Reply:

    Evan- Thanks for the comment! I am sure we will come to a good conclusion. 🙂


  4. Robert says:

    Eggs are actually pretty cheap. And I’m not sure how much chickens eat, but probably not enough to justify the expense. Stick with a bowl of fish.


    Mrs Money Reply:

    Robert- I’ll have to go buy myself a betta. They are pretty cool! 🙂

    We buy organic eggs, which are around $3 a dozen.


  5. sue says:

    I appreciate Mr.’s POV, but as a dedicated chicken-lover (and one who is saving up to build her coop), I have to say there’s more to chickens than meet the eye.

    Dogs can be trained to protect your chickens (i.e., female investments), not kill them. Who’s in charge – you or the dog?

    Chickens (hens) can lay eggs w/o a rooster. This is verifiable fact, not myth. You do not have to annoy your neighbors with a crowing roo in order to get fresh eggs.

    Chickens are omnivores – just like us. You can (and need to) feed them calcium and other things found in laying-feed or pellets, but the majority of what they consume would be the things you throw out every day. Think fresh fruit & veggies, rinds from fresh fruit, peelings of veggies & fruit, bread, scraps, etc. No meat, but other than that, they eat what you eat.

    They are hard work – to keep up with them, to feed them when it’s snowing like crazy, to keep the water from freezing in the winter, etc. But they are tremendously entertaining and will readily love you for the attention you lavish on them.

    If you’re squeamish, see if you can buy an established hen or two (called pullets) from a 4H kid in the area. The kid will have raised them to laying-age and the girl(s) will be used to handling, etc. Plus, you’ll benefit your local farming kids and 4H.

    Just a few thoughts from one who can’t wait to get her Buff Orpingtons, Barred Rocks, etc. 🙂


    Mrs Money Reply:

    Sue- I think the dogs would get used to them too.

    Growing up, my grandmother always had chicks in the spring. She even kept them in her house! They were so cute. I remember how much I enjoyed helping take care of them. 🙂

    I like the 4H idea! I used to be in 4H!

    Thanks for the support!


  6. AJ says:

    I love the idea of having chickens and think it would be a great hobby. There are only two things on Mr. Money’s list that would keep me from getting them.

    1. The laws. But that’s easy to look into.

    More importantly, 2. your neighbors. While you may not get a rooster, chickens can be noisy! My boss has several and they’re always making a racket. I like to be considerate of my neighbors and hope they are the same (although sadly that isn’t the case in our current neighborhood).

    I vote for getting a few acres with your next house and setting it up there. 🙂 I really want a goat, my boss has one and it’s just like a dog! But we’ll have to wait a few years before starting our little farm. 🙂


    Mrs Money Reply:

    AJ- Mr. Money emailed the city. We’ll see what they say. I’m also planning on talking to our neighbors. We have almost an acre here and it’s just a little too small for us. I like the idea of a few acres! 🙂

    And I’d love a goat too!


  7. Akborn says:

    First off I am super new to your blog but I have to admit that I am either very dedicate, have no life or all of the above :-)…. Lol
    secondly I have to agree mr m does point out some good points but I did want to mention my most recent experience.
    Last year my family and I got it in our heads we wanted chickens. We talked plan and pulled out all the books. Figure it wouldn’t be too hard raising chicks in a southern state, originally from Alaska so figure it would be easy and decided againts buying from chicken magizine and go with a local raiser(with hopes the breed would handle better) long story cut short, guy over charged us lol but we did get a mixure of ages which was awesome. Because we had 3-4 layers, 10 going to lay in2-4 months and 10 babes ready in 6-8. Lol. On the cost subject yes they can be expensive but we did find we were able to cut the cost to only 18-30 a month (could of cut even more but my 4 year old kept feeding them lol) and we feed them all the scraps except meat even gave them their shells back but heard that you want to make sure they are really crushed Which is what we did. Also another thing I wanted to point out there are super awesome with the compost pile, at least ours were lol they kept it moving and raking it. But kept in mind if u think rabits are bad on a garden these help critters can do a number lol. But I doubt there’s really nothing I can offer for info that you don’t already know plus I honestly could kept going on with my personal experience but I am close to a novel already. Lol thank for you info on all your posts. And good luck with the chickys I know once you get them you will have a blast 🙂


    Mrs Money Reply:

    Akborn- Thanks! We’ll see if we get some in the spring. I know we went to get chickens from Tractor Supply company last year and you had to buy a minimum of some number I can’t remember. I’ll have to look on craigslist too!


  8. Daddy Paul says:

    I don’t want chickens either. One of my neighbors does and the way he raises them I would rather go buy them at the store than from him. If the wind is just right I lose my taste for eggs for a few days.


  9. Daddy Paul says:

    Chickens (hens) can lay eggs w/o a rooster. This is verifiable fact, not myth. You do not have to annoy your neighbors with a crowing roo in order to get fresh eggs.
    I think it is against the law to sell eggs which have been fertilized without labeling the carton. Fertilized eggs do taste different. I won’t cook a fertilized unless it is baked. They actually taste better in most baked goods.


    Mrs Money Reply:

    Daddy Paul- Oh no! That stinks about your neighbor’s chickens 🙁

    I remember when I was little, we always got eggs from my grandmother. It was interesting to see double yokes and fertilized eggs! I don’t know that I can taste the difference though. 🙂


  10. Matt Jabs says:

    I say go for it Mr. $… you can always get rid of them & say “I told you so.” But if you never let Mrs. $ have a crack at it she will always wonder and always want them. 🙂


    Mrs Money Reply:

    Matt- We would have a few good dinners from them. 😉 Thanks for your vote on my side!


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