How Far Would you go to Have a Baby?
By Mrs Money on May 14, 2009 – 5:41 pm -
I think this may be TMI (too much information), but I think I’ve already gone there many times. We’re having a hard time getting pregnant. And we don’t know how far we want to go to make our dreams come true. Obviously money has a play into it, as fertility treatments can be really expensive, but emotion plays into it as well. I’m trying to be both logical and practical, but it just doesn’t seem to work when you’re trying to have a baby.
I have PCOS, or polycystic ovary syndrome, which is giving me all kinds of trouble, the main part being I can’t get pregnant. I went to the doctor today and she’s written me a prescription for a drug that will hopefully help counter act the symptoms and possibly get me knocked up. The truth is, I’m scared to take it. We all know what a green health nut I am, and this is just not natural! So the little green gremlin in me screams “Don’t take it! You can take herbs and correct it with your diet!” but then the practical mini Mrs. Money says “look how far that’s gotten you”. I guess there are just sometimes you just have to succumb to modern medicine. The end result is that I get the baby, right?
I think we’re just going to try this route first and see how it works. Other fertility methods can be super expensive, and I just don’t know how much dough I’m willing to shell out on this adventure to get pregnant. I know that sounds horrible, but it’s the truth? What would I be accomplishing if I spent $50,000 on getting pregnant and then can’t afford to raise the child? That doesn’t make any sense at all. (By the way, I obviously don’t have $50,000 to be spending on getting pregnant.)
I just makes me wonder though, how far will we go to have a baby? How far would you go?
Posted in Personal | 17 Comments »
May 14th, 2009 at 7:14 pm
I’m really sorry you’re facing difficulties! I hope you’ll be able to figure out these answers to your tough questions.
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May 14th, 2009 at 8:20 pm
Why not adopt? Fertility treatments are dangerous as well as expensive (I personally believe there could be a correlation between fertility hormones and breast cancer), and so many children need loving homes!
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May 14th, 2009 at 8:31 pm
On another note, have you tried acupuncture as well as herbs and diet? That can be very effective…
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May 15th, 2009 at 12:47 pm
I’m sorry you are having trouble.
I think I would go pretty far to have a baby. I can’t put a dollar figure on it. I have to think $50,000 would be on the upper end… if not over the top.
I would also be open to the option of adopting. (not that your not open to it) But adopting is way expensive too. And emotionally does kind of feel like a last resort. I would try at least some fertility options first.
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May 15th, 2009 at 6:37 pm
I have PCOS too. I have found that Vitex helped a lot with regulating my cycles but was not enough to get me pregnant. I have tried clomid also but that did not work. Fertility treatments are expensive and very invasive on your life. The testing alone is not very fun. I have also found that adoption is a GREAT way to build a family and my husband and I are in the early stages. One thing about adoption that most people do not know, is that there is a tax credit. You get up to almost $11000 back in taxes the next year. So if you spend $15000 on adoption, then you will get $11000 back. Whereas fertility treatments you can spend up to $50000, and you could still not have a baby. I would suggest to not go in to it lightly though either way. Do what feels right to you. If you really want a biological child, try every thing necessary to do that. If you want a family and don’t care how that comes to pass, then adopt!
Good luck!
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May 28th, 2009 at 5:44 pm
Kacie- Thanks for the support!
Deirdre- I’ve always wanted to adopt, so maybe we’ll have one of our own and the next we’ll adopt. We’ll see how it goes. I actually got acupuncture while we were in CO and some herbs. It was so cool! We’ll see how that works.
Ashley- Thanks so much for your kind words. $50,000 sounds like a ton of money, but when you consider what you get out of it it’s not that bad. I do hope it doesn’t cost us that much though!
Angee- I’ve tried vitex with little success but could give it another shot. I actually got acupuncture recently and hopefully that will help. I have a prescription for Clomid, Metformin, and Provera. I haven’t filled it yet but will in the future as a last resort. I’m scared of multiples! I do appreciate your comment, and good luck with everything!
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July 15th, 2009 at 6:31 pm
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September 22nd, 2009 at 6:15 pm
I’m a little late to the conversation. Hopefully you’re already pregnant! A friend of mine had PCOS and was able to conceive via infertility treatments (one girl, via clomid) and twin boys, via IVF. It is scary but I know she would say it was worth the expense.
I am also going through infertility treatments and I had to chime in about the well-meaning comments on adoptions. I don’t know how you feel about adoption but I think you should never feel guilt about wanting to have your own biological children. I am sure you can love an adopted child just as much; however, no one ever asks any person who had the biological child the ‘natural’ way why they didn’t just adopt.
If you do go down the IVF path, and are not covered by insurance, be sure to double check your medication costs. I ordered all my meds via a specialty pharmacy only to learn later that some of the meds are available for much less at walmarts due to the $4 prescription program. Also ask for samples.
Best of luck.
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Mrs Money Reply:
September 23rd, 2009 at 5:36 pm
Nope, still not pregnant.
I figure it will happen in time. I am so glad your friend had success with Clomid! I have a prescription right now for it.
My insurance doesn’t cover the Clomid but it’s only $9 so I can afford that, thank God! I figure that after a couple years if we can’t get pregnant we’ll look into adoption. I’m still young (26) so I can wait. I think!
Thanks so much for your comment!
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Tiffanie Reply:
September 27th, 2009 at 12:41 am
I was going to ask if you’d tried Clomid. I have a friend who also has PCOS and was able to get pregnant on Clomid. 1 boy. And now, 2.5 years later she is pregnant with #2! Not sure of the sex, but definitely only one baby. She was also extremely nervous about the health risks and risk of multiples. She seemed to do well with it.
Whatever your choice, I wish you the best of luck. It will come in time if it’s meant to be!
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Mrs Money Reply:
September 28th, 2009 at 2:04 pm
Thank you so much! I really appreciate your kind comments! I am glad to hear a success story. We think we’ll go for it after Christmas!
September 29th, 2009 at 6:39 pm
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November 24th, 2009 at 6:18 pm
I am late as well to this convo, I clicked over to your blog from JD’s. I hope you are having success in your quest to get pregnent, and if you’re not, stay strong!
Have you tried alternative medicines (chinese or herbal) yet? I always say, before doing something invasive, try out something that won’t hurt you first. Its relatively inexpensive and safe!
I lived in Japan for two years and Chinese medicine is considered very “normal.” This has helped me to get over the fear caused by infamiliarity. I have had a lot of success with it in other health areas (including women’s health). I haven’t tried to get pregnent (yet) but a site I have used to buy chinese medicine is: http://www.fertilitynow.net/
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January 1st, 2010 at 5:32 pm
Latecomer here!!! All the way to Russia…. We have unexplained infertility and opted to adopt rather than trying fertility treatments. Now there are two munchkins from Russia running around our home!!! However, I don’t think that I will ever lose the desire to have biological children… Been seven years now….maybe 2010 is our year!!
Praying that your treatments will be successful…
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